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Update 2020-12-16: (True sticky posts banned; click to read.) So, owing to the evolution of the internet, or at least my own approach to it,...

Friday, August 23, 2013

Speak of it in a Soft, Sharp Whisper Some More

Good luck with this post. Certain amount of made-up language here. And that may be the least of my problems....

A while back, I took perhaps something of a risk and posted publicly about a most bizarre, possibly genetic, and delightfully euphoric phenomenon for anyone who, like me, gets it. What follows is just sort of an improvised disorganization of some further thoughts on the topic of what the 'Net has come to call "Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response", or ASMR. I just call it "meridian" myself, except on Twitter, whose format makes "#ASMR" advantageous. "Meridian" just sounds better than "a-ess-em-arr", doesn't it? Rolls off the tongue better, certainly.

One so-called "ASMRtist" came to follow me on the blue bird network. This is not someone whose work I had encountered previously, but unlike many people, most of whom follow me and then unfollow me a couple days later, she had the courtesy to respond when I sent her a greeting. (That's what I do when I gain a follower; I warmly greet them. I have thirty-six followers. I know the most recent one won't stay; they've not acknowledged my three-and-a-half-day-old greeting. Why do I keep getting sidetracked into people being anti-social on social networks? Ah, well...) Therefore, I took her to be someone worth investigating. I plugged in and donned my headphones, brought up her 'Tube channel, picked out a video that looked like my audio realm, and put it on.



Just short of 43 minutes. (By the way, I usually just listen to these meridian videos while they play and I look at other tabs. It's all about the audio; no reason to just sit here watching 'em. Eyes can be otherwise engaged all the while.) Maybe some gamers are actually paying wide-eyed attention to this material; an attractive, young female is whispering about their favorite thing! And that's fine; I will wholeheartedly grant that. But I do feel a need to say this: The meridian is quite strongly triggered in the beginning. However, as the video plays on, the effect diminishes, and by the half-hour mark, due either to natural exhaustion of whatever it is off which the meridian feeds, or to my own mind drifting into 2012 Appalachia or 13,291 Mediterranea and therefore away from the video audio, the meridian has gone for the moment, leaving only a sort of ambient audio piece I'm hearing, featuring whispers and the occasional click of a button or other item. Of course, ambiance can still be soothing in the more traditional sense; it's soft and gentle and capable of comfort. But the meridian, the supernatural euphoria darting yet beyond the reach of our human comprehension, has fled, to return another time soon.

A number of patrons of YouTube's "ASMarts" have chimed in with comments of gratitude, some claiming that the videos help put them to sleep. This is an interesting idea. The meridian-less, soothing ambiance that the, uh, "muggle" (unfortunate soul who doesn't get meridian) would get from the experience of listening to whispering (or tapping/crinkling/etc.) could certainly serve as a lullaby of sorts. (I just realized, a "lullaby" is "a" thing "by" which to "lull" to relative sedation. Ha ha.) But does meridian, when it happens, come with the standard hormones that could calm the person to sleep? In my high school, we had a choice between either physics or anatomy; I went with physics, so I'm kind of making things up about anatomy. But despite fairly frequently emerging from meridian indulgence (maybe there should be a word for "indulging in meridian", the way we have "masturbate" for "indulge in the pursuit of sexual orgasm"; "meristurbating"?) without feeling the least notable bit sleepier than before I clicked ►, I do have to wonder if the non-sexual upper-body euphoria is related to similar .....dopamine?.....releases within the body as with the traditional sexual orgasm. With traditional sexual orgasms, I usually — but not always! — do feel rather sleepy in the immediate aftermath. Or maybe that's because I tend to masturbate in bed, right before I'm aiming to sleep anyway, so it could be a bit skewed.* No, I still recall feeling sleepy in class during high school when having my private, hands-free sub-orgasm sexual euphoriae in my pants. Then again, why wouldn't I have been sleepy in class? Damn thing started at eight in the morning every friggin' weekday.

Meridian really does need some actual scientific studies. Control groups! Muggles and ....non-muggles. (Did we decide on a name for people who get meridian? I don't know.) Male and female. Young and old. Times of day. Intervals between meridian indulgences. See if there's a correlation between non-mugglehood and certain other selective genetic traits. Can non-muggles generally also wiggle their ears, or curl their tongue into a U? I can tell you that for me, just as I tend to feel meridian more strongly on the right than the left, so I am also better at wiggling my right ear than my left. My tongue curls nicely when so driven, and, for some reason, while I am right-handed, my left hand does the better "live long and prosper". And, I think we gotta compare personality types across the board. Are non-muggles ("meridianists"? "meridiots"? Help!) generally less violent than their unfortunate counterparts? You know, make orgasms, not war? Ahhh.....

Meridian needs scientific studies — if we can turn enough people on to the idea that the phenomenon exists. The very idea of it is still rather emerging, ever gradually, from our digitally collected conscience and risking making muggles bitter and angry. It ain't made its way into too many renowned publications, but I think it is, ever gradually, as I say, gaining momentum. Some of the 'Tube meridian community, according to one of the other videos on Donna's account, have evidently collaborated to produce a documentary about it. I recognized in that video one particular "ASMRtist" ⒜ whom I take to be the ambassador of meridian and its community to the world, and ⒝ whose videos I've most certainly enjoyed the most (often) since I discovered this whole technological revolution on the matter. I'll embed one of hers here: simple speaking and stereo close-up ear-to-ear whispers — in Russian, because, as with the German above, it's chock full of consonants, and the content of the words is like the points on Whose Line — it doesn't matter one bit. Also, it's significantly shorter than the above, at a mere 12.24. (Again, headphones are essential!)



Nobody so far triggers my left side like Maria. (Sounds like an old song, right there.)

Trying to think if there was more I wanted to say now while I'm on this topic. I can't stand reality television, but my mother gladly watches Big Brother, among other atrocities. I haven't talked at all explicitly aloud about meridian, but I did mention to Mom as I was passing through: "The one good thing about Big Brother is, sometimes they whisper." "What? What does that have to do with anything?" "I like whispering. Whispering is good. It's soothing." "[shakes head] That's one of the weirdest things you've said! You've said a lot of weird things, but this is one of the weirdest!" Yes, perhaps it is. Probably because, although I'm not about to listen to a Big Brother marathon with headphones (I know I said content doesn't matter, but please...), I have one of the weirdest phenomena in mind.



P.S. I wonder how I would react to an actual person whispering directly to me. Maybe....some day.....



Edit 2014-5-3: A third meridian post



*While there is no apparent sexual connection to meridian, I will often get one single meridian-style euphoric SHOT down my right side while I'm in bed and have just turned on to my side for sleep after sexually masturbating to climax. Actually, I'll sometimes run my thumbnails against the pillow and blanket right up by either ear while I'm in bed and "meristurbate" that way.

Au Naturel?

While crawling through my 'Book feed a few days ago, I chanced upon a friend's thread, all about whether or not women ought to ever shave any part of them — pits, legs, something in between — any part. I couldn't immediately think of something to say about it, so I went on with my unemployed day, dodging family and cruising in Street View. (Side note: I've actually discovered Geoguessr since I posted that link from May; however, I've momentarily taken a break from landing in Brasil every game and getting super-annoyed in Russia. I have nothing against Brasil, mind you; I'm sure it's as fine a country as one can find in South America. I just prefer a little more variety in my blind-drop nations. As for Russia, it seems rather a chaotic place. Driving there is obviously insane; even though Street View images are static, it shows. And I'm sure everyone's heard about them a fair amount in the news. They'll harbor the whistleblower Snowden, but they'll hard-labor-imprison most of Pussy Riot while they thrash homosexuals and the like in various manners. In my yearning for world travels, I think I'll pass on the old Soviet master.) ......Where was I? Women's body hair, right. And as I clicked down the winding road, something struck me. This became my comment.

*~*~*~*

I'm fiddling around in Street View right now, as I'm all too wont to do. At the moment, I'm in a piece of Appalachia. There are bits where the imagery wavers between old, low-def 2008 imagery and new, hi-def 2012 imagery. Aside from the vastly improved resolution, there are obvious roads that didn't quite exist in 2008. This is difficult for my life-long midwest-bound mind to grasp, but, in Appalachia, it is necessary to carve into hills to make room for roads. Most of the roads run through the spaces formerly occupied by the now-erased bits of hill, leaving all this exposed rock.

While the exposed rock at the roadside is a kind of exotica to me in the corn fields, it is also, when I get down to it, kind of bizarre. There's all this wonderful green around, and then, every last bit of a sudden, there's this odd wall of lifeless tan. As newly done as it is, there isn't a blade of grass in the whole thing — at least, until I get to where it isn't quite so new, and nature has started to reclaim that lost real estate at the roadside in its way. The newer exposed rock looks decidedly unnatural and a tad off-putting.

It rather reminded me of this thread, which I saw earlier. ★

Sunday, August 18, 2013

Pointless Lament (draft)

The song took a little bit to write after the idea behind it started forming. It's still rather taking that bit. Here's what the lyrics look like as I head to bed couch. (As it happens, my aunt from out of town is here tonight and using what's usually my bed.)

Countless orbs in space
fortune may grant one
with all the right
sparks for life
a proper distance from its sun
and resources are abound
but filler's much more rife
chance may deliver
yes she may give her
self up for the sake of life

and it's a long long road between bases
relentless static grey
scattered semblances of oases
may distract you along the way
and there are miles of barren wasteland
where it seems like nothing's there
don't it seem like hard times drag right on
the good times seem so rare

Seven days a week
fortune may grant two
to pause your quest
take a rest
and do the things you wanna do
and the months pass by
before a high
holiday comes around
and then's your chance
to see your aunts
and everyone else you love from out of town

and it's a long long road between bases
relentless numbing grey
scattered semblances of oases
may dissuade you along the way
and there are scores of heartless zombies
separating folks who care
don't you see the hard times stretch right on
and the good times seem so rare

Billions of earth-bound souls
fortune may grant three
to cherish you
care for you
accept you as true family
you'll hunt for words of wisdom
among sheer droves of jive
in eons and eons of pure void
there's just this short time we're alive

and it's a long long road between bases
relentless static grey
enigmas behind kindly faces
may divert you along the way
amid the miles of barren wasteland
where life just seems so bare
don't you feel the hard times plod right on
while the good times seem so rare

yeah it's a long long road between bases
relentless numbing grey
scattered semblances of oases
just might help you along the way
but there are hordes of heartless zombies
masquerading as folks who care
don't it seem the hard times trudge right on
and the good times are so rare

Wednesday, August 7, 2013

Thirst (lyrics)

One of my usual isolated angst rooted pop-rockers.

A dog eat dog world
ain't got much place for cats
such cannibal animals
just ain't where it's at

where'm I gonna run to
where'm I gonna go
who will I meet there
will either of us show

This courtship
don't short shrift
leave me on my own
your grain waves
your brain waves
shake me to the bone

who'm I gonna turn to
is it worth the trip
I need full nourishment
more than just a sip

Ambrosia
nectar of the gods
Ambrosia
tie the ends and odds
Ambrosia
I ain't got a lotta time

Ambrosia
you taunt my mortal reach
Ambrosia
my sense of hope you breach
what holds ya
speakin' out is not a crime

this dog eat dog world
ain't for no one but the birds (and nasty curs)
we manifest at a test
of sheer power of our words (and we hope we're heard)

it's time we gotta act, now
for so long we've rehearsed
you recognize my needs
you can quench my thirst

Ambrosia
in my cones and rods
Ambrosia
tie those ends and odds
I told ya
pretty soon I gotta fly

Major-Minor (lyrics)

I still haven't quite figured out exactly how the music for this goes, but I can tell you that it's a highly Beatlesque piece, ideally played on a piano (which is not at all my instrument) and featuring copious slick musical references to the likes of Tintern Abbey, The Aerovons, Badfinger, "I Am the Walrus", some other things, and, as you may guess from these lyrics....."Hey Jude".

Hey Judas
don't make it worse
it's pretty bad
as it stands

your music
has scapes and verse
that belie
a crooked man

you waltzed into our hearts
with mass collections of the arts
you gladly shared
as though you cared

then we gave control you never had
and all since then we all too badly fared
we're past repair
what has you scared?

Hey Judas
please leave my skin
so I'll begin
to improve

'cause my mood is
so paper thin
it's prone to snap
right in two

the damage done, the havoc wreaked
you and the barkeep streaked
right down the hall
no last call

now I've got to say, your new dark days
your wily silent ways
of handling all
just appall
you just appall

where's the harmony (it's gone)
hear the harmony (in my song)
where's the harmony (all gone)
here you're harmin' me (what did I do wrong)

Hey Judas
yer scary mug
gonna get
counter-clocked some day

'cause your ass
is way too smug
and I sense
it's high time you paid

Aaaaahhhh
Aaaaahhhh
Aaaaahhhh
Aaaaahhhh......